North Carolina's Big News
Here in North Carolina, we just passed a lottery bill! Lottery coming to North Carolina! Look out! I'm not a big lottery player, but since a lot of people are, and they just went to Virginia, South Carolina, or Tennessee to buy their tickets, I don't see what the big fuss was all about. But, it WAS a big fuss, and in honor of the passage of the lottery bill, I present yesterday's Barney Google, or Snuffy Smith, or whatever it's called these days:
First of all, for those of us living in North Carolina, we can all now breathe a sigh of relief, knowing that this strip does not take place in these here parts. Y'all, we ain't gonna git the lot'ry up an' runnin' for a few months, yet. I s'pose these here dang hillbillies are livin' in another of our fine South'rn states. Thank God!
Just looked it up, they're in Kentucky. My birthplace. Fantastic. Here are some people from Kentucky: Loweezy Smith and Ashley Judd. Also: Snuffy Smith and George Clooney. This should be on their license plates: KENTUCKY: Home of Horses, Hillbillies, and Hotties. It would beat their current license plate which looks like something only potheads or toddlers might apreciate.
So, anyhooo. . . in Kentucky you get your lottery winnings in cash right away? Or do you ask for a lottery ticket, and they just hand you a $20 bill? Why is he holding the cash instead of the scratched off ticket? Why does the shopkeeper include "cash" on his list of options? HE'S ALREADY GOT THE CASH. YOU DON'T HAVE TO GIVE IT TO HIM.
What does the shopkeeper have on his left arm? An epaulet? A red spiral thing with a ribbon hanging off of it? What the hell is that? Is that some hill billy thing? Or a Kentucky thing? I lived there less than 3 months, so maybe Ashley Judd would know.
First of all, for those of us living in North Carolina, we can all now breathe a sigh of relief, knowing that this strip does not take place in these here parts. Y'all, we ain't gonna git the lot'ry up an' runnin' for a few months, yet. I s'pose these here dang hillbillies are livin' in another of our fine South'rn states. Thank God!
Just looked it up, they're in Kentucky. My birthplace. Fantastic. Here are some people from Kentucky: Loweezy Smith and Ashley Judd. Also: Snuffy Smith and George Clooney. This should be on their license plates: KENTUCKY: Home of Horses, Hillbillies, and Hotties. It would beat their current license plate which looks like something only potheads or toddlers might apreciate.
So, anyhooo. . . in Kentucky you get your lottery winnings in cash right away? Or do you ask for a lottery ticket, and they just hand you a $20 bill? Why is he holding the cash instead of the scratched off ticket? Why does the shopkeeper include "cash" on his list of options? HE'S ALREADY GOT THE CASH. YOU DON'T HAVE TO GIVE IT TO HIM.
What does the shopkeeper have on his left arm? An epaulet? A red spiral thing with a ribbon hanging off of it? What the hell is that? Is that some hill billy thing? Or a Kentucky thing? I lived there less than 3 months, so maybe Ashley Judd would know.
posted by big al at 9:15 PM
1 Comments:
In California, you get cash for winnings up to (something) hundred dollars (I think it's $300.) There's nothing like walking out of the corner store in the not-so-great neighborhood in which you work and having the owner yell at all the thugs reading porno that "This lady just won $100 at MY store! It's in her purse, why don't you follow her to the subway and take it!" (OK, part of that wasn't aloud.)
But he didn't hand me cash and THEN ask how I wanted it.
Store owners are genuinely glad that you've won, because they get something from Lotto and they can get a rep as a "lucky" store.
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