When Awful Things Happen to Awful People
Like a phoning-it-in comic strip artist, I'm not even going to bother coming up with original material for this post. Instead, a suggestion from Braniff, which I repeat verbatim:
Has anyone posted a Top Ten list of bad things they want to have happen to Cathy? (Such as being bitten by her dog with rabies, finding out that her new husband is having an affair with Charlene, who is HIV-positive, etc.) That could be lots of fun!
And already one entry, from Nick:
Cathy is mauled by her dog [Big Al says: I believe that would be Elektra] and her face is horribly disfigured. She undergoes a face transplant, which includes a NOSE! Unsure what this new organ does, Cathy is unprepared when hay fever season hits. She drips snot all over her new transplant, which becomes infected. The infection spreads to her brain and she dies.
Don't have enough hatred for a cartoon character to wish ill will on her? Well, I do. And if you don't, here are some more observations to help you out:
AACK! Just when I think she can't be any more vain and self-obssessed.
More proof that Irving's never actually seen her naked. I mean, he knows what she's going to look like in that thing, right? Apparently not, because he's never seen her naked. Ah, poor body image and low self esteem, two components of a rockin' sex life.
No wonder, as suggested by Braniff, Irving may have had a little sumthin' sumthin' going on with Charlene.
So go ahead, what's the worst thing that can happen to Cathy? You know you hate her, let's hear it!
Has anyone posted a Top Ten list of bad things they want to have happen to Cathy? (Such as being bitten by her dog with rabies, finding out that her new husband is having an affair with Charlene, who is HIV-positive, etc.) That could be lots of fun!
And already one entry, from Nick:
Cathy is mauled by her dog [Big Al says: I believe that would be Elektra] and her face is horribly disfigured. She undergoes a face transplant, which includes a NOSE! Unsure what this new organ does, Cathy is unprepared when hay fever season hits. She drips snot all over her new transplant, which becomes infected. The infection spreads to her brain and she dies.
Don't have enough hatred for a cartoon character to wish ill will on her? Well, I do. And if you don't, here are some more observations to help you out:
AACK! Just when I think she can't be any more vain and self-obssessed.
More proof that Irving's never actually seen her naked. I mean, he knows what she's going to look like in that thing, right? Apparently not, because he's never seen her naked. Ah, poor body image and low self esteem, two components of a rockin' sex life.
No wonder, as suggested by Braniff, Irving may have had a little sumthin' sumthin' going on with Charlene.
So go ahead, what's the worst thing that can happen to Cathy? You know you hate her, let's hear it!
posted by big al at 4:51 PM
5 Comments:
Feel proud, big Al!
Your hometown is mentioned in Marmaduke's Doggone funnies!
Cathy hate:
She grows a nose and suddenly realizes she stinks.
one by one newspapers around the country drop this has-been strip until it's only carried by 2 papers, the Sunday parade section, and Grit.
Cathy suffocates when giving sexual favors to Mr. Pinkley.
Need I spell it out???? She doesn't have a nose and her method of sexual favor means she can't be breathing through her mouth. . . think Monica Lewinksy . . .
While vacationing at the beach, Cathy is mistaken for a wounded sea lion and is eaten by Sherman from Sherman's Lagoon. Irving is not nearly as distraught as he thought he'd be, and ends up running away with Mr. Pinkley to Key West.
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